Nina In New York: Goodbye, Taxi TV. We'll Miss Complaining About You.

A lighthearted look at news, events, culture and everyday life in New York. The opinions expressed are solely those of the writer.
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By Nina Pajak

Oh, thank the heavens. In a move that should surprise no one, the TLC seems to be on its way to removing the televisions in the backseats of its taxis. I never thought I'd be so happy to see a screen disappear from my life.

I'm not sure what made them think this might have been a good idea in the first place. Was it the romantic notion of tourists relaxing in the back of a cab, blissing out to the sound of Sandy Kenyon's good-natured movie reviews? Or was it the image of millions of passengers smearing their filthy fingers on a communal screen in the hopes of learning more about a sophisticated night out at Dos Caminos? Perhaps it was the assumption that we, the city-dwellers who never sleep, would want to be tuned in 24/7, refusing to miss a beat even while we're in transit. And that means making sure we use our commuting time to watch a single Kimmel bit and Jeopardy question over and over again, on loop, every four minutes or so. It's all very valuable.

I know that when I enter a taxi, the first thing I do is mute or power down the television so that I can hear myself think or speak without the accompanying bass line from a vodka ad. The next thing I do is think about how I would probably be ready to drive myself off the Queensborough Bridge if I had to drive this car and listen to this drivel for hours and hours on end. The next, next thing I do is turn the TV off again, because it has inevitably and mysteriously spontaneously reanimated.

Here is what I want to do when I sit down in a cab:

a) Talk to a friend, either in person or on the phone.
b) Sit quietly and stare out the window.
c) Sit quietly and stare at my stupid phone.
d) Fret about traffic and how late I already am.

I do NOT see any room on that list for:

e) Reading the same eight headlines on a smudgy, small screen located six inches out of my natural eye level.

The system isn't all bad. Its screens have introduced the ability to pay for a ride by credit card, or at least to attempt to pay by credit card until your driver tells you the machine is broken and drives you to an ATM after engaging in a heated verbal altercation over whether you should have been carrying cash with you to begin with. They've also apparently provided drivers with important weather information and aided people in recovering lost belongings, thanks to its storage of trip data.

However, it seems pretty clear that what was groundbreaking in 2008 has long seen its day by now. We're moving on to bigger and better, like a whole new GPS meter system that works with our personal devices and confuses me immeasurably. But whatever, I'm all for it. Why not, at this point? Just so long as it's quiet, secure, and doesn't mean that I have to start watching promos for Eyewitness News on my phone in between texts. I like to save those for when I'm on the bus.

Nina Pajak is a writer living with her husband, daughter and dog in Queens. Connect with Nina on Twitter!